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Letter of Misunderstanding
TO: Sally Weston FROM: William Gray, Governor, Stropbare Reformatory RE: Lunch

Thank you so much for joining me for lunch at my club on Wednesday. It was wonderful to meet a young woman who shares my interest in reformatory discipline, and enjoys the Blue Moon books as much as I do.

I loved the way you interrogated Lord Roberts and Sir Snowdown about why the club was still males-only; I thought the old geezers were going to have a heart attack. It was delightfully impertinent of you, in a cheeky sort of way. You're quite the little spitfire, Sally!

Given your interest in reformatory discipline, and my expertise in the manner, I was wondering if you might wish to visit my office in the city sometime, for a look at my historic collection of reformatory straps and canes?

There are several local school emporiums in the area, which will outfit you with a suitable regulation school kit, so you may look the part prior to your visit. With you in proper attire, and me properly armed, I can deliberate in detail about your conduct at the club, and elucidate to you the importance of showing deference to your betters.

Eagerly awaiting your reply,

Mr. William Gray

Governor, Stropbare Reformatory

---oOo---
TO: William Gray FROM: Sally Weston RE: Your kind offer

It is I who owe you thanks for the delightful lunch, which I truly enjoyed. I'm sorry Mr. Friar set his pants on fire with his cigar while he was arguing with me, and I feel terrible for laughing at him as he ripped them off.

And I really shouldn't have shouted, "Friar, Friar, pants on fire." How mischievous of me!

As for your kind offer of a meeting in the city, I must decline. Although I find your offer intriguing in the extreme, the simple truth is I am not a delinquent. While I understand that the miscreants in your care at the Stropbare Reformatory are routinely birched, paddled, strapped, and caned for fantastical "crimes" such as "impertinence" and "cheekiness", such a draconian sentence would be entirely inappropriate for me.

I am not a reformatory ruffian, but a young American heiress of some considerable means, summering in England. Caning the reformatory sluts in your care is justice. Caning me would be assault. Since I'm assuming you enjoy running a prison more than you would enjoy staying in one, I must respectfully decline your highly attractive offer, beguiling though it might be.

I am not interested in a role-play, for however realistic the scenario might seem it would in fact be a play.

And can we not agree that as an adult woman, I'm far too old too wear a school uniform?

I'm shocked at you, Governor Gray! Aren't you getting a little old for such antics? I have quite a tight little bottom, and I wouldn't want you to injure yourself. Ha!